F the downtown mall project

the short of it - go to http://www.mydowntownmall.com/contactus.htm and let them know their plan to spend 7.5 million on bricks and other b.s. is bogus.

CVille is gonna drop 7.5 million on downtown mall repairs... $200,000 a year would maintain it nicely - equivalent to 38 years...

Last time I went to a city hall meeting it was "well, we'd certainly like to put that $500 crosswalk in at Buford elementary school, to prevent kids from risking traffic accidents.... except we don't have the money right now. You understand, we can't spend the money if we don't have it..."

On the other hand maybe they're full of it...

Tell them to shut up and do as little as possible - they don't do too much well...

Remember the 10 million dollar visitor center - 6 million spent in planning....
3rd Street - one year to brick one block...
the $400,000 "free" speech wall...
Court Square - 2 years to renovate 2 blocks... over budget and FUBAR.
And now they're gonna repave and renovate the entire downtown mall in 5 months.

These jokers have already spent close to $1,000,000 planning this. Just picking themselves and having endless meetings and bagels and probably no less than a few gallons of coffee per person. $1,000,000 bucks. That is a lot of crosswalks for a lot of kids. That's one $1,000 laptop for 1,000 kids. That's money these fools have already spent - put the boo in boondoggle ....

http://www.mydowntownmall.com/contactus.htm

Thank you, Lionel Estavoyer, you sucka

It's been almost four months since this site got an update. Knowing life and schedules it could have as easily been four years. Well here's to quality over quantity, and so to our wonderful readers we now may share the dirt, courtesy Lionel Estavoyer, who had the audacity to call the author of this site a coward in a short email sent June 3rd 2008

il suffit simplement d'un peu de courage pour inscrire un nom. Ca n'est pas plus compliqué. Et pour ma part, vous donner le mien ne me pose auun problème. Bonne journée. L.Estavoyer

And really, honestly my first thought was to write back some decent nominally clever response explaining why normal, rational, capable Internet literate humans often use aliases rather that their real names. And then Guns 'n Roses came on the radio. And that changes things.

ALOHA M. Estavoyer,

On the one hand I might read your catty email and reply politely in French to explain why placing one's name and other personal information on the Internet is not the best plan. I might cleverly devise some way to call you a full-blown (no pun intended) fool so quietly only a few, perhaps not even you, might hear it.

On the other hand, listen up sucker, you've been had. Chances are she sucked you off and now you're wondering what that itchy rash is and when it's going away. Could be herpes; it often flares up in the summer time and when emotions get hot, so try to stay cool and calm. I recommend you go to your local dealer and score something strong, you may need it. Swallow a double dose, have a beer, and Man Up.

All that aside next time you're in town let's meet up. Granted I won't be taking you to the C$O on my dollar (http://avenue.org/afc/BookFestival2005.html), perhaps Durty Nelly's though (http://durtynellyscville.com). And I promise not to kick your bitchy little ass.

ALOHA,
Anson D. Parker

So it's like that. Get in the ring.

sultan of slushee's wins election

the sultan of slushees has won the city council election. c'est la vie

Sarkozy is a genius, Obama is a slum bum.

Sarkozy, we in Charlottesville love you! Lesley Stahl got personal, and you got outta there - c'est finit! Sante! It's obvious Stahl was trying to get in your pants, her thin charade about your wife was clearly a ploy to discuss your behavior below the belt... what a slut! Anyhow, 60 minutes is a terrible show and only dummkopf's watch it. Your ratings are certain to rise up on both sides of the pond. Trust me, real American's don't ask about wives, girlfriends, or mistresses unless absolutely necessary - how declasse! Encore, Encore!

Obama - you showed up in C-ville with your white stretch limo and little blinking lights on the side. Big pimpin in the south, huh? Your welcome reception came from a punk "you bring an apology for that Virginia Tech trash talk?"
of course not. Your posse looked around sheepishly and you acted like nothing was said. Your ego could fill most rooms, and probably got a nice stroking at the amphitheater... if economic violence and physical violence are the same thing... well I got a $1 and it's like Axl Rose said "Get in the ring mfr"

SATYENDRA'S SUPA DUPA SLUSH FUND

Who knew while we were balking over a $15,000 screw-up sculpture Ole' Saty was stinkin up C-ville with a $439,000 budget for him and his pals to party with. That's some serious wamoola!!! So who's on the take: at the top of the list - the Piedmont Housing Alliance (of which the Urban Turban is a board member). Habitat for (in)Humanity (the same fubar group that bought the only trailer park in town with plans to convert it into a bunch of cheesy condos).

So here's a rundown of this weeks quotes on Mr. Fart-in-Place...

"There was no controversy about the projects themselves - it had more to do with the process. . .It was very troubling to those of us in the room. . . [The fund] can't be only available to groups that happen to be the favorites of whoever happens to be administering the fund." - Councilor Dave Norris

"Nobody is trying to do anything backhanded, deal-making in the background of a smoke-filled room. . ." - PHA Executive Director Stu Armstrong

"I thought everybody knew about it. . ." - Habitat Executive Director and Committee Member Overton McGehee

~ ~ ~

“If you’re going to have public art, the public needs a say.” - Councilor Kevin Lynch.

“If there’s going to be citizen art, there should be a public art competition.” - Councilor Kendra Hamilton.

"The design didn’t really excite me.” - Mayor David Brown

“It was reviewed by a jury of peers who know art and they thought it was a wonderful idea,” wannabe councilor Huja.... sure they did, right. Listen up pud - go jerk it somewhere else.

This reporter thinks ole F.I.P.'s statue is lookin' like an R.I.P. headstone...

Festival of the Photograph vs Salon de l'Erotisme - Prudes v Perverts

Charlottesville's Festival of the Photograph went through with only a few minor hitches... seems some gorilla was peeking at Besancon's Salon de l'Erotisme and got a bit excited.... this is hard to watch. Ya gotta give some to Besancon for their in-your-face hedonism and Las Vegas style promotion.... not much though. Frankly the prudes who get scared when their kids see a monkey with a hard-on should take a trip to the Natural Bridge Zoo, or visit a goat farm... maybe take notes (no pictures, huh?) ... as for team Besancon... no question ya'll are winning the freakshow, meanwhile Charlottesville's hedonist crew represents with a bit more class a la Shentai Carnival...

meanwhile try to imagine the Paramount theatre hosting one of these.... fun for the whole fubar family...